Sinclair Says: January 2014

As a creature of habit I am happy to report that as of today we're back on a "regular" schedule. Well, except for the fact that they have closed school again tomorrow due to extremely cold temperatures. In my 12 years of school in Minnesota I remember plenty of snow days but never a cold day. At any rate, it is a good excuse for hot cocoa and a movie. Or catching up the blog. And asking for parenting advice.

We're coming off of a very busy and fun-filled Christmas and birthday season. Mark, Sue and Becky joined us in Hastings over Christmas and we returned to Okoboji for the annual Sinclair Christmas celebration. Jacob celebrated turning 6 on New Year's Day with four of his buddies. Nikki celebrated turning 36 bucking 30 mph wind gusts on I-90 (thankfully in a car with heat) and Scott celebrates turning 37 today braving the Polar Vortex (thankfully from a heated office). I know we chose to live here so I am not complaining, but during the months of January and February we often discuss the possibility of moving to a warmer climate.

As I look ahead into the new year one of my goals (which I suspect will be ongoing) is to teach Jacob about gratefulness. Oh my. I am going to have to be in prayer about this one because I struggle with selfishness myself. Have you ever tried to teach somebody something that you aren't good at? Not easy.

Jacob is an awesome kid - and at the ripe old age of six I am amazed at his compassion. But I am also amazed at how ungrateful he acts even after our living room is scattered with new toys. With three sessions of gift giving for Christmas and four sessions of birthday gift giving you can imagine the loads of toys we've been blessed with.

One of the things Jacob has been doing is putting toys under his bed. This started out as a few things that he didn't want Nathan to play with. For instance, a lego set that he had put together. For awhile it worked out okay because Nathan had no idea there was anything under Jacob's bed. It seemed like a fine idea - especially since the top of my fridge was out of space. But then, we started finding balls. And lego duplos (intended for Nathan to play with) and both fire trucks, and a a stash of airplanes and a box of army men, and monster trucks, and well, let's just say it was borderline hoarding. Nathan eventually figured out there were toys under his bed and it caused a lot of fuss before bath / bedtime.

After removing the toys from under Jacob's bed this morning we've instilled a new "no toys under the bed" rule. It's not that we don't want Jacob to have his own things that he needs to be responsible for, but we also want him to share willingly. Generally Jacob and Nathan share all of their toys but there are definitely things that were given to each of them specifically. I am honestly stumped. My irrational, controlling self was ready to grab the Cub foods boxes from our storage room and box up every single toy and offer them one or two to play with at a time. Then, Scott and I discussed a locker. With a lock. That just seems ridiculous. We have sorted and donated so maybe we're needing to incorporate something like that again and let Jacob be a part of it. Or maybe, we just quietly and gently correct him. And eventually he'll get it. Did I mention school was closed again tomorrow? Maybe I just patiently wait for our normal schedule to resume. I never understood why parents were so excited for school to start in the fall but I think I have a glimpse as to why.

I know sometimes it's just plain tough to be the big brother. He told Dad his morning he doesn't want to be 6 anymore. Can you blame him? After they came downstairs from a post meltdown discussion and apology look what they found on the kitchen table…

Exhibit A: Giant bite taken out of Jacob's bubble tape. Suspect: Nathan

Funny enough, I just had a vivid memory of my childhood. I remember one Christmas when my cousin Melanie and I both got Cabbage Patch Koosa dolls. Do you remember these? I had my own very cute one - Peaches was its name. I can't even believe I remember that. Melanie's was different than mine and I might have thought hers was as cool (or maybe more cool) but I actually hid the doll in our front hall closet! I suppose I was hoping she would forget about it, make the long drive back to Michigan and I would have two dolls to play with. I remember them searching high and low for it and finally it got to the point where I couldn't take it anymore. I just "happened" to find it stuffed in the dark front hall closet. Mmm hmm. I'm sure my mom and aunt knew better. Now I know where Jacob gets it.

I suppose this is yet another parenting phase that we will stumble through and by God's grace, mercy and patience be gently guided in the right direction. As much as I desperately want to raise a "perfect" child that is polite, kind, uses his manners, and thinks about others, I am thankful that the Lord doesn't expect us to be perfect parents or perfect people all the time but it comes down to Jacob's heart (and ours). As long as He is in the center - we'll be moving in the right direction.

I will leave with you from some of my favorite pictures from the last month. Thanks for checking in and wishing you much love and laughter in 2014!